Two Years Ago Today

Two years ago today, Jaymeson and I suffered from Carbon Monoxide (CO) poisoning while I was 36 weeks pregnant with Tatum. Jaymeson and I have been through a lot the last 2 years during our recovery, and still have a lot to go through. A lot of it is unknown at this point, but it is there.

I didn't think today was going to feel much different than any other day. But, I woke up this morning, moved the laundry from the washer to the dryer, heard my sweet baby boy shout "Mom! Get out?" from behind his bedroom door, and I burst into tears. I opened his bedroom door and I saw his sweet, perfect, little face laying on his bed just staring at me. I picked him up and held him close, kissed his face a million times, and whispered "I love you so much" in his ear over and over again. He even whispered "love you much" back. He will never understand the magnitude of my love for him. He will never fully understand what it meant to save his parents lives before he was even born. And I will never forget that I could have lived my life without him in it.

Jaymeson and I often lay together after the kids go to bed and just hold each other and reminisce about our lives and our story. This one comes up often as we talk about the changes that we are each going through and how they effect ourselves and each other and our families. It's still so unreal to both of us. It's like it was all a dream. I can't even explain it. We lived those moments, we are still suffering from the experience, but somehow it just doesn't seem real. 

I heard on a song on the radio recently that reminded me of how I feel currently. I hate when official music videos ruin the song. So here it is with just the lyrics,

And all those things I didn't say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream them loud tonight
Can you hear my voice this time?
This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I'm alright song
My power's turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong
I'll play my fight song
'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me

Starting today, I will let go of what's gone, appreciate what still remains, and look forward to what's coming next.

Don't know what I'm talking about? Look here and here for a recap.

One Year

It's been ONE YEAR since this happened. One year, since we almost lost our own lives, and our unborn baby's life. One year, that changed the rest of our lives forever.

It's been a long time since I've blogged, so I had to make a dramatic opening. ;)

But really, it's been one year exactly since Jaymeson sluggishly drove us to the hospital with concerns about not feeling the baby move, only to find out we were minutes away from death by Carbon Monoxide poisoning. Jaymeson and I think about that day all the time. It's really crazy to think about and to try to remember all the details!

I think about the feeling of me not being able to sleep all night, and the feeling of having to physically wake Jaymeson up that morning. I think about how it took us over an hour to pack our weekend bag to check out because we were both so weak. I think about Jaymeson opening the window in the bedroom and telling me that he felt like he could breath better when he stuck his head out of the window. I think about feeling weird and dark, and weak. I think about finally getting our bags together and dropping to the floor next to the front door because I couldn't move anymore. I think about stumbling down the hallway to the elevator and telling Jaymeson to just leave me because I couldn't go anymore. I think about him encouraging me and lifting me out of the chair so that we could get out of the building. I think about finally getting out the front door and slowly walking through the parking lot to our car, dropping our bags and collapsing in the car. I think about sitting in the passenger seat waiting to feel better, to feel anything. I think about Jaymeson calling my doctor's office because I hadn't felt the baby move in days. I think about waiting for a call back from my doctor who reluctantly told us to go ahead and come to Labor and Delivery. I think about checking into the hospital and having my blood taken. I think about my doctor coming back into our room with the test results, with wide eyes, telling us that I had outrageous amounts of CO in my blood and the baby was barely alive. I think about them taking Jaymeson to the Emergency Room and being left by myself with hardly any understanding of what was going on. I think about that one last text from Jaymeson telling me they were hooking him up to all sorts of machines, before his phone died and I didn't heard from him for hours. I think about the doctors telling us that we were lucky to be alive and that they shouldn't have told us to drive ourselves to the hospital. I think about them telling me that they were going to have to transport Jaymeson to another hospital to treat him. I think about my doctor trying all sorts of methods to get the baby's heart rate moving again. I think about begging the doctor to find a way to keep me and Jaymeson together. I think about being wheeled down the hall towards the Hyperbaric Chambers, not knowing at all what they were, but knowing I'd be spending the next 3 hours locked inside of one. I think about finally seeing Jaymeson again, in a wheelchair, with an oxygen mask strapped to his face. I think about them putting the air tight helmet on my head and panicking because of claustrophobia. I think about being injected with Adavan to calm my nerves. I think about test after test after test and no sleep and no understanding what was going on. I think about my how scared we were that the baby wasn't going to be okay. I think about them telling us that we would have serious neurological damage that would affect us for the rest of our lives. I think about the doctors repeatedly telling me that I was in "uncharted territories" and they had never heard of a situation like mine. (Being 36 weeks pregnant and having CO poisoning as serious as ours.) I think about hearing the doctors saying that they didn't know what was going to happen to the baby.

Carbon Monoxide is funny. The symptoms are never ending. At least that's what all of our doctors tell us. Symptoms we felt then, are completely different and stronger now 6 months later. Symptoms 6 months later are different and stronger now, one year later. It's very heartbreaking for me to think about the damage that CO poisoning can do to someone, and then hear that most people don't get treated for it. Most people feel like we felt, and just let it be and then end up with so much Neurological damage later on in their lives. And then I think about how we almost did that. If it wasn't for not feeling the baby moving, we probably would have done that. And Tatum might not have made it. We might have ended up completely brain damaged. Tatum is our life saver.

The hardest thing for me to think about, is not having him. I didn't even love him or know him then. A lot of people talk about becoming pregnant and immediately being in love with their baby before they are even born. It wasn't like that for me. I loved him then, but I didn't know how much I loved him. And to think about him passing away and never being able to meet him and get to know him and feel this way about him, makes my heart break.

We don't talk about this a lot, because it is awkward, and sad, and frustrating, but I have been encouraged by my doctors to open up about our situation so that we can create a strong support group for ourselves. Jaymeson and I are suffering from the never ending symptoms of CO poisoning. At first we felt fine, and slowly as the months went on, we noticed that I was forgetting things. I was stumbling over my own feet. I was having trouble concentrating. I was leaving the stove on all night, or my car on all day. Jaymeson was slurring words and not making sense. Both of us are abnormally fatigued, and our body temperature not the same. At our 6 month follow up appointment, our Hyperbaric doctor made the determination that I needed to have extensive neuro-psychological testing. Jaymeson did as well, but he wasn't ready to take that step. My 8 hour appointment was scheduled one month in advance.

So, I took the day off work, arranged for Tatum to be babysat by my good friend and next door neighbor, and headed to my appointment. I had no idea what to expect, and I had no idea how exhausting the testing was going to be. But I did it, and I'm so glad I did. One month later I came back for the results. They told me that my tests show that I have highly above average intelligence, that I am very capable, and that everything looks good. Except for my memory. For my age and health, memory is normally in the 80%. Mine came back 20% and I was told that if the treatment they were going to send me to didn't work, then I was on the road to Dementia. I got a referral for Cognitive Rehab, to work on my working memory, memorial recall, processing, and concentration.They also determined that they wanted to do a little bit more testing on my balance, and also my eyes. So I was sent to a Balance Specialist and a Neuro-Ophthalmologist (this appointment is yet to be scheduled).

I go to Cognitive Rehab every week, and it is very difficult. We practice a lot of memory and concentration skills, and I usually end my hour very fatigued and with a headache. I really like my therapist and I'm really hoping that it starts to get easier because sometimes I feel like I can no longer take it. One thing that I really need to work on is taking it easy. I'm so used to taking on a lot of responsibilties and being able to handle it, but currently my brain is not capable of handling as much as it used to. It was a very hard and emotional session when we came to the realization that I needed to give some of it up and rely more on my "support system."

I did go to the Balance Specialist, where within 5 minutes of testing, they determined that I would need to go to Balance Rehab as well. My hearing was perfect, and everything else looked good. The problem was that the part of my brain that helps me to balance, has died or is severely damaged. I have noticed more and more lately that I get dizzy easily and black out occasionally. Sometimes I am so dizzy that I throw up. I go to Balance Rehab about every other week. We practice a lot of skills to help me rebuild my balance and stability, but it's very hard. I would say it's even harder than the Cognitive Rehab. I usually leave feeling very sick and am out of it for the rest of the day.

Jaymeson has finally decided he is ready to take the neurological tests that I did, and his appointment is scheduled for the end of August. 

Tatum is still very unknown. He seems like a very healthy and happy baby boy, but I am told over and over again that his development levels could change at any time. So, we wait. And we pray that by some miracle, he will stay healthy and not be affected by the CO poisoning. It makes my heart break to think about him having to feel and go through the things that I am going through right now. 

One year ago, our lives changed in the craziest way. I know that every thing happens for a reason, but I can't say I understand in any way why this happened to us. I am grateful that we made it, I am grateful that Jaymeson pushed me so hard to get out of that building, and I am grateful our baby boy is here with us. His first birthday is next week, and I am so excited to celebrate his life with our friends and family. 

When Jaymeson and I are both done treating, we have big plans to create awareness for CO poisoning. It is a very scary thing that most people are in the dark about. If you don't have CO detectors in your home, I URGE you to get them. They are only about $25 per detector, and they can save your life. Get your furnaces and boilers checked every year, and make sure they check for CO before they leave. 

Well, that's all for now! I will try to do better with the blog. Love you all! 

Introducing My Baby...

Tatum Blake Roush

Born on Friday, July 19, 2013, at 6:17 AM

6 lbs. 12 oz. and 20 1/2  in. long

In honor of Tatum's 4 month birthday tomorrow, I have decided to finally write his birth story. Here goes!

Everything had been going like normal, other than the fact that Jaymeson and I had Carbon Monoxide poisoning 10 days previously, which meant I would have to go to fetal monitoring 2-3 times a week. During those appointments, they discovered that my baby was not creating any amniotic fluid (because of the CO poisoning), and my levels were very low. They had talked about maybe having to induce me if it got too low, but at that time I was okay.

On July 18, I was officially full time at 37 weeks. I woke up and went to work like normal, although I noticed that I had started to leak something. I didn't really think much of it because everything is always so weird when you are pregnant, and went about my work day. Throughout the day it got worse, where I was going to the bathroom every few minutes because the pads I was wearing were full. (TMI? Sorry.) So I started to think, what if my water broke? I texted me wonderful neighbor, Chelsea, to ask her what it feels like when your water breaks. She is the mother of 4 children, and always has really great advice so I thought she might be good to ask. She told me her thoughts and then recommended that I call my midwife.

Well.... I really didn't want to call my midwife, so I just went about my day. Then I thought, maybe I should ask Jaymeson what he thinks. So I did. He also told me to call the midwife. I thought about it for a little while, and then I decided to call my midwife. I explained what happened, she asked a few questions about contractions and such, and then said "Well, come on in. If you're not going to have this baby on your own, then we are going to have to induce you." I hung up the phone. Looked out of my office door, made eye contact with Megan (a fellow pregnant co-worker) who asked if I was ok, and I immediately started bawling. I was not ready to have a baby! And I definitely didn't want to be induced.

Some of my coworkers came into the office and tried to calm me down. Another coworker ran upstairs to tell my boss that I was going to have a baby and that we would be leaving soon. His response was "Well, better take her to the hospital. We don't have any towels." Why am I not surprised at that response? ;) Meanwhile, the leaking continued. I called Jaymeson to let him know that I was going to the hospital and they said they would induce me. He informed me that he was all the way out in Springville (close to an hour from the hospital) and wouldn't be able to leave until a replacement came. (It's like my worst fear about labor was coming true.)

I got to the hospital, checked into labor and delivery, put on one of  those awful gowns, and waited for a nurse to come check me out. They hooked me up to the fetal monitors that I had become so familiar with, and then checked to see if my water had actually broken. During this process, we could see that I was having pretty steady and strong contractions, however I didn't feel any of them.

They lifted my bed and shined an obnoxiously bright spotlight at my baby making areas to check for my water breaking. They kept referring to something called "Ferning", which I eventually found out was how they could tell if your water had broken. They swipe your vaginal area with a swab, put it on a slide, let it sit for about 10 minutes, stick it under a microscope, and if they see ferning (the shape of an actual fern plant), then your water has broken. Well... they came back, and said that it hadn't. So I asked what I could possibly be leaking, and they didn't have any answers. I asked them to please check again to see if my water had broken, because I knew that it had. They lifted my bed again, got out that annoying spotlight and did their "ferning" process again. While we were waiting for the results, someone came in with an ultrasound machine to measure my amniotic fluid. It was lower than it had recently been, but still not too low, so they determined that part of the fluid was being hidden. 15 minutes later, they came back with results of the ferning test and said that my water had indeed, not broken. I, again, asked what I could possibly be leaking if my water hadn't broken, and the response was "You must have a yeast infection." Right. I have absolutely no signs of a yeast infection, I am 37 weeks pregnant, and I am leaking,  but no, I just have a Yeast Infection. I asked them if they could at least check me for dilation, in which they responded that they would do that at my next appointment, which wasn't for 6 days. Ok then.

They gave me a prescription for antibiotics to clear up my so-called Yeast Infection. I got dressed, checked out of the hospital, and went to get my prescription. (Side note, I think the worst thing about being pregnant, is going to the hospital, thinking you are in labor, and finding out that you are not.) My plan was to head back to work, but by the time I finally got my prescription, it was close to 4:00 and I didn't feel like it. So I left the hospital, let Jaymeson know I was being sent home, and headed over to pick up Jayah from her moms.

On the way to Jayah's mom, I started having contractions that I could feel and were painful. . They came out of nowhere and where immediately only a few minutes apart. I picked her up, and she begged me to take her swimming at Jaymeson's mom's house. We went home to get our swimsuits and then headed over. My neighbor called to see how everything went at the hospital, and could tell that I was in a lot of pain while we were on the phone. She recommended going back to the hospital, but I of course didn't listen because I didn't want to get sent home again. (Reminder, always listen to Chelsea. She knows best.) So I went on my way to my mother in laws.

Once we got there, the contractions had gotten even more painful, and she could immediately tell that I was in a lot of pain. I kept having to go to the bathroom, but I couldn't. I was doubled over on the couch trying to handle these contractions. I couldn't concentrate or respond to anything anyone was saying to me. I remember being in the bathroom, and my friend Cassie called, and even she could tell I was having a hard time!

Jayah kept begging to go out to the pool, so we decided to head out there and get me in the water to see if that helped at all. By now, my mother in law was almost positive that I was going to have a baby that night. We had started to time my contractions and they were about 2 minutes apart for over a minute long. I asked my mother in law to call my midwife and she did. She explained the situation to the midwife on call (also the one who I had seen earlier that day), who's response was "Well, she can come in if she wants, but she's going to be disappointed when I have to send her home again." She also said that I could have contractions like that for days before going into labor, to which I thought, NO WAY can I have contractions like this for days. I am completely dysfunctional like this. In the meantime, my friend Stephanie (who was due 9 days after me) had heard the news that I was having contractions and was texting me. I don't remember anything we talked about it, but I am sure that it was along the lines of freaking out, and oh my gosh you are having a baby.

After getting in the pool (which made it worse), we decided that I needed to go back to the hospital. My mother in law called Jaymeson (who was still out in Springville) and told him that I would be having the baby tonight and he needed to get home to take me to the hospital as soon as possible. After what felt like hours (was probably really only an hour), Jaymeson got there, picked me up, and we headed to the hospital.

Throughout my whole pregnancy, I had decided that I wanted to have a natural birth. At least, I wanted to try. On the car ride there, I was in a lot of pain and made the decision that no way was I going to try to do this natural. We got to the hospital, checked in, and I immediately asked the nurse for an epidural. She told me that she couldn't give me an epidural because they weren't sure if I was in labor or not, but they could give me some pain killers to take the edge off. Yea right. That stuff didn't work at all. All I remember about this part was that I kept telling Jaymeson how stupid this was ("this" meaning the pain), and how much I hated it, etc. Haha!

They lifted my bed up, got out the annoying spotlight again to check for ferning, came back about 15 minutes later and confirmed that my water HAD broken and I was dilated to 3 cm.. Thank you for confirming what I already knew was true. Luckily this time, it was a different midwife so I didn't scream at her for sending me home earlier when she shouldn't. I liked this one also, because she was the one who was there during the CO hospitalization, so I was familiar with her, and she was really nice.

After they confirmed that my water had broken, they brought in the anesthesiologist to give me the epidural. Once the epidural was in, I was in HEAVEN. It seriously, was the best thing ever. And I will never even think about doing a natural birth again.  I was calm, I wasn't in pain, and Jaymeson and I were left sitting there talking about how crazy it was that we were going to be having a baby that night. Shortly after this, Jaymeson's mom brought Jayah to the hospital to hang out with us. We played some games, watched some tv, and talked about what her baby brother would look like.

Shortly after that, Jaymeson, Jayah, and Jill left to get food and pack a hospital bag for me. (Reminder, don't wait until 37 weeks to back your hospital bag... just in case.) About half an hour after they left, they called to see where I was at. I had dilated to a 7! They hadn't even been home yet, so they raced home, then they raced back to the hospital so that they wouldn't miss anything. Jaymeson told me that Jill was driving 80 miles an hour the whole way back to the hospital.

A few hours went by, and I was still dilated to a 7. My contractions were still 1-2 minutes apart for over a minute long (though, luckily I couldn't feel them.) My midwife had decided that she needed to do something to speed up the labor, so she gave me some Potocin. At that point, they checked to make sure the baby wasn't breached or anything like that. They found out that he was head down, but he was face up. They said that I could still delivery him that way, but that it would be more difficult. So they decided to try to get him to turn by having me lay in certain, weird positions until it was time to push.

By then it was after 9:00. Jayah had fallen asleep, Jaymeson was falling asleep, and Jill was texting me parents keeping them updated. Hours passed, and I was left awake watching stupid middle of the night tv shows and waiting for something to happen. Finally, 5:00 AM or so came around on the 19th and my midwife told me that the baby had turned face down, it was time to push. Holy cow, this was it! I woke up Jaymeson and Jill and got ready to push.

How come nobody warns you about pushing? Pushing was by far, the hardest part of labor. It was so tiring, and there were times where I didn't think I could do it. I pushed for about an hour, and out came my cone headed, bald baby boy. At some point during pushing, I had taken my glasses off. So when he came out, and they plopped him down on my chest, I really couldn't see anything. The lights were dim, and I was honestly too tired from pushing to care. Then they took him away to measure him and everything, and brought him back.

They informed me that because he was in my belly too long without any amniotic fluid, that he had a fever and an infection, so they were going to have to take him away from monitoring and antibiotics. I got to hold him for a few minutes, wake up Jayah to hold her new baby brother (yes she slept through the entire delivery process), take a picture, and then they took him away. They finished cleaning me up and then wheeled me to my room where I would be spending the rest of my time at the hospital.

I didn't see Tatum for a few hours after he was born. You know how mom's will say that they fell in love with their baby the moment the laid eyes on him/her? That wasn't the case for me. It took me a few days to really fall in love with Tatum. And I really believe that it was because I didn't get to spend any real time with him while we were in the hospital because they kept taking him away from me for testing and antibiotics. Jaymeson had to work all night the night after Tatum was born, so my wonderful mother in law came and stayed with me at the hospital. When Jaymeson came, he was of course exhausted, so he slept all day. Then he had to work again all night. And slept all day again, the next day. So, I spent a lot of time alone.

Because of the lack of oxygen to Tatum's kidneys, he was not pooping or peeing like he was supposed to. They were worried that his kidney's might be defective and talked about having to keep him longer even after we were discharged. I did not want to leave my baby at the hospital by himself! Luckily, just before we were discharged, he pooped and they let us take him home. We got him dressed in a cute outfit and put him in his cute carseat and headed home. It was the craziest feeling to me and I was completely overwhelmed.

We pulled up to our house and I sat in the car bawling my eyes out because I was so overwhelmed and I didn't know how to be a mom. I contribute a lot of the reason that I was so overwhelmed to the fact that my house was a disaster. We didn't know, or even expect me to go into labor so soon, so we hadn't prepared at all. My wonderful mother in law could sense that and hung out at our house for a few hours and deep cleaned everywhere. I love her and I am so grateful for her. It was really hard for me being so far away from my family, and having none of my family there for support, but she took such good care of me. I couldn't ask for a better support system and mother in law than her. :)

So, now my sweet baby boy turns 4 months old tomorrow and I am so in love with me. After I had him, everyone would ask me if there was anything about having a baby that surprised me. My response was always, "I never knew that I would love him this much." And it is so true. I love Tatum more than anything in the world and the past 4 months have been the happiest of my entire life. He is perfect and wonderful and I am so grateful to be his mother. I love you baby boy!

At 4 months, Tatum is very vocal. He talks all the time and is very opinionated in his "words." He smiles so big when he sees me and his daddy, and he loves to be held. I am no longer able to nurse, so he drinks from a bottle that he can hold himself. He wakes up every 3 hours or so to eat and then he goes right back to sleep. He loves to hang out in his Johnny Bouncer (even though he can't bounce himself, he just likes to stand in it.) He was blessed on October 13, in Texas with my family. And he is the light of our lives. Here are some pictures of his life so far (sorry they are out of order):

1 month old

1 month old

2 weeks old

1 day old

2 Days old

6 weeks old

3 months old

2 months old

Almost 4 months old

The day our unborn baby saved our lives...

Jaymeson and I decided to take a weekend getaway to celebrate our one year anniversary, and have a little together time before this baby comes. We did it about 4 weeks in advance, just in case the baby decided to come early.

 We decided to stay in downtown Salt Lake City at the Kimball Condos, and take a few days to just relax and be together. Friday night after Jayah got picked up by her mom, we loaded into the car and went to dinner at Jaymeson's favorite restaurant, Ruby River. After dinner, we decided we should probably stock up on some snacks (AKA cereal) for the weekend because the condo we were staying in had a full kitchen for us to use. We raced to Jaymeson's mom's store to hopefully get there before it closed and didn't make it. So we decided to brave the Downtown Harmons. Holy craziness, where do you even park at that place?? It's like a 3 or 4 story grocery store, with cooking classes and tons of other stuff inside. Cool place, but really, where are you supposed to park? We stocked up on some cereal and got a redbox and headed to the condo for the night. I wasn't feeling very good, so I ended up falling asleep, leaving my sweet husband to watch Breaking Dawn Pt. 2 by himself.

Saturday, we woke up whenever our bodies felt like it, and went to the Salt Lake City Temple to do some sealings. One of my best friends has a tradition with her husband that they do sealings every year on their anniversary, so I decided to steal their tradition. :) Thanks Jess! It was actually the first time that Jaymeson or I had ever done sealings, besides our own. And it was pretty cool. :) After sealings, we walked around temple square and then walked back to the condo to change into regular clothes.

 For lunch, we decided to go walk around City Creek. We ate at Johnny Rockets, and then wandered City Creek until Jaymeson realized that City Creek was a completely different place than the Gateway. So, we got in our car and drove on over to the Gateway, because that's where we wanted to be. At the Gateway, we walked around and did some window shopping, checked out Build-a-Bear, and a few other fun places, and even got the online price for some PJs that I wanted for the baby's delivery from Victoria's Secret. (Which you will see later...)

Then it started to rain. And as you know, the Gateway is an outdoor mall. So we found some shelter and sat and waited out the rain. Then we went to see "Now You See Me" at the Gateway Theatre, which was actually pretty good. Jaymeson had a pretty strong headache the entire time, so I don't know how much of it he actually saw, but I would recommend it!

After the movie, we drove around downtown to find a gas station to get Jaymeson some tylenol or something. There are NO gas stations downtown. It took us maybe 15 minutes to find one! Then we went back to the condo, Jaymeson fell asleep, and I continued to watch Breaking Dawn Pt. 2 by myself!

I developed a headache at some point in the night and didn't sleep very much. At about 8 AM or so, I gave up trying to sleep and decided to eat some cereal and start packing up because we had to check out of the condo by 11. I had started to feel kind of weird, weak mostly. I woke up Jaymeson shortly after, and he still had a bad headache. He took a shower, hoping that would help, and then attempted to help me pack everything up for check out. Both of us starting to feel very light headed, and weak. It was the weirdest thing. We would take a few steps and then stumble and have to lay down or sit down before we could see clearly again. The whole room seemed dim, every sound seemed like it was inside our heads, and we could barely do anything without needing to take a break.

Jaymeson felt like he wasn't able to breath very well, so he opened the windows and we hung out of them for a few minutes before we continued trying to pack up. It took us close to 2 hours to get our tiny weekend bags packed and out the door. In fact, we got everything next to the door and had to stop and lay down for a few minutes before we could even continue. Jaymeson felt like there was really something wrong in that room and pushed us both to get out of the building as quickly as we could. We stumbled to the elevator and (Jaymeson's brother makes fun of me for this...) I told Jaymeson to just go ahead and go while I rested for a few minutes and then I would meet him out there. He encouraged me to get up and come with him so that we could both get out together. So I did.

We checked out and stumbled out to the car. We threw our bags on the ground and got in the car so we could rest. We sat there for about 30 minutes before Jaymeson had the strength to get out and put our bags in the car. We continued sitting there for another 30 minutes, because neither of us had the strength to drive away. I started to get really worried because I hadn't felt the baby move in a few days (you are supposed to feel them 10 times in an hour), so Jaymeson called my midwives office and explained the situation to the answering service. The midwife called back shortly later, and suggested that we come into Labor and Delivery and have the baby monitored.

So, Jaymeson somehow mustered up enough strength to drive us from downtown SLC to the hospital where I will be delivering. They hooked me up to an IV (my first IV ever) and baby monitors to monitor my uterus and the baby's heart rate. Once the monitors were on, we saw that the baby's heart rate was very low, almost not there. So they decided to keep me monitored for a little while, and try a couple things to shake the baby up to get his heart rate going again. 

The nurse kept asking about our weekend, and after Jaymeson explained how we were feeling that morning, she decided that she needed to test my blood. They took 6 or 7 viles of blood from me. A few minutes later, the nurse received a call from whoever tested my blood, went away to take the call, came back and said "You have an outrageous amount of carbon monoxide in your blood. And I'm assuming you do too (to Jaymeson). Let's get you to the ER." So, they took my husband to the ER, and hooked me up to an oxygen mask, while I sat there really not understanding what was going on.

They kept coming in and out asking more questions about where we were, and how long we had been there, etc. She said that the guy who tested the blood asked if we had spent the night in a building on fire, because our carbon monoxide levels were so high. (Normal is 0-2, and both of ours were over 22+.) She said that we were lucky to be alive, and that she should not have had us drive ourselves to the hospital.

Jaymeson's phone died, so I had no idea what was going on with him. They kept mentioning this weird chamber thing and that they were going to have to transport Jaymeson to a different hospital, and a whole bunch of other stuff that I didn't understand, and then my mother in law showed up. Luckily, Jaymeson was able to get ahold of her before his phone died so she came as quickly as she scould. She saw Jaymeson first in the ER and said that he was hooked up to oxygen and IV's like I was. In the meantime, the baby's heart rate was still "sluggish".

After an hour or so, they said they were going to take me to the Hyperbaric Chamber, and that they were able to figure out a way to have Jaymeson and I together. Thank goodness. So, they wheeled me to another part of the hospital where I met Jaymeson. Both of us in hospital gowns, hooked up to oxygen masks. They took more blood, ran a few other tests, and then talked about how we'd be spending the next 3 hours in the Hyperbaric Chamber. I still really had no idea what that meant. 

They wheeled us into a room that reminded me of being in a spaceship or something. They talked about how they were going to pressurize the room to the "third atmosphere" and fill the room with straight oxygen. The purpose being to basically suck all of the carbon monoxide out of our system, and add straight oxygen. Good news is, we could watch a movie! 

They sealed the doors shut with me, Jaymeson, and a technician inside. The room started to pressurize, and we could feel our ears popping. Once we were to the "third atmosphere", we had to put our helmets on. This part really freaked me out. I am slightly claustrophobic, so when I had this helmet suctioned to my neck, I started to panic. I got the technicians attention and mouthed to him that I couldn't breath. He was very nice, but probably thought I was an idiot because his response was "You are breathing straight oxygen." He came to the conclusion that I was just a crazy person, and pumped my IV up with Adavan, to calm my anxiety. It worked pretty quickly. We sat there and watched Bruce Almighty, and even a few episodes of Friends until the time was up. The room de-pressurized and the doors were opened.

 Then we went back to my room. Jaymeson was treated as an Outpatient, but he of course stayed in the hospital with me. I was hooked up to constant baby monitors and an IV. After the first treatment, the baby's heart rate livened up quite a bit, although I still hadn't felt him moving. We had dinner and had a few visitors and finally got to sleep around 1 in the morning. I was woken up several times in the night by the nurses because the baby monitor wasn't picking up anything. It was so frustrating! I think one of my nurses got so annoyed with having to come in so often, that she hooked the monitor up so tight that when I took it off in the morning, there was a huge crater in my belly.

They had us in separate Hyperbaric Chambers for our last 2 treatments. Jaymeson had to be up at 5:30 AM to go to his, and then mine was right after. This time, we were in individual chambers, which I thought would be way worse. But it actually wasn't. They gave me a small dose of Adavan, just in case I got crazy again, and we got to again, watch a movie. 

We had a short break, where we got to visit a little bit with Jayah (Weirdly enough, her mom was a few doors down having a baby while we were getting our treatments.) We ate lunch, and then Jaymeson was off to his next treatment. I took a nap, and then went to mine right after. When we were done, they did Neurological tests on both of us and more blood tests, and we were released. They talked about how there was a possibility of relapse, which would include memory loss, slurred words, etc, but there was no way to tell if that would happen to us or not. We were informed that we would have long term fatigue, and would feel hotter than normal, (Great, just what I needed at 36 weeks pregnant.) and that we would be more susceptible to carbon monoxide poisoning in the future. They also said the baby could possibly have Neurological damage, but there was no way to know until he was born.

 We went to dinner with Jaymeson's mom, picked up Jayah for the night, and hung out at his mom's house until we were all too exhausted to do anything else. We both had the next day off of work, because I had a follow up appointment or two for the baby. We mostly just relaxed and spent some time together, reliving the craziness of the weekend. Sometimes, I still can't believe it even happened!

We had a follow up appointment 2 weeks after the incident with the Hyperbaric people, and I had doctor's appointments every other day doing stress testing on the baby. I was low on amniotic fluid after the incident because the baby wasn't getting any oxygen from me during the whole ordeal. Any oxygen he had, he was storing in his brain and heart, and not sending any to his kidneys, so he stopped creating amniotic fluid. Normal levels are between 8 and 24 and they struggle to find 5-7 each time. 

His heart rate looked fine mostly, but they considered having to induce me because they thought that out of my belly may have been safer than in my belly at that point. Although, that was just an assumption. I heard from every nurse and doctor that they really didn't know what to do with me because I was in "uncharted territories". They had never known of a situation like mine, being pregnant and poisoned by carbon monoxide. They encouraged me to lay down as much as possible and drink 3 liters of water a day to see if that will help. Luckily (or unluckily) I lost my job with JetBlue because I was hospitalized during training, so I was not working 7:00 AM-9:00 PM every day. I did continue to work full time with the law firm though... that is until I went in to early labor. But that is a story for another post. :)

We both are still in such disbelief of the whole situation. You hear about things like this happening, but never think it could happen to you or someone you know. Several of the Hyperbaric doctors told us that most people who are exposed to carbon monoxide never get treated and end up with neurological damage down the road. Sometimes they are even exposed in their sleep and never end up waking up. They told us several stories of people who carry portable CO detectors with them and have found themselves in places, such as restaurants, hotel rooms, even outdoors, with high levels if CO in the air. Needless to say, next time we've got a little extra money (you know, after the several thousand dollars of medical bills we all have now...) we will be purchasing a portable CO detector for every member of our little family. Just to be safe. 

I've received reports back from the fire department and the gas company, and found that just about every boiler in the building had something wrong with it, including broken pipes, unsealed doors, and recalled parts. The building was evacuated for inspections and testing, and carbon monoxide levels near our room were over 4000 ppm! Reports also showed that other people were treated in the hospital, but we were the only ones with high enough levels to need Hyperbaric treatment. 

And that is the story of how our unborn baby saved our lives. Although he will never understand what he did, we are forever grateful to him. If I had felt him moving, we would not have gone to the hospital that day. We would have gone home and waited out our weird sickness and possibly had some severe neurological damage because of it. Not only did he save our lives, but he saved the lives of every one in the building. If we had not gone to the hospital, the fire department may have never been called and the building may have never been evacuated, and a lot of people could have suffered worse poisoning than ours or even death. When I think about that, I get chills. So many people could have died that day. It's so scary. 

We still do not know if or what kind of neurological damage Tatum may have, but I am hopeful that he is just fine. He is a lively, happy baby, and looks and seems absolutely perfect. Only time will tell, but I think our little one will be blessed and will be just fine. :)

We love you baby boy!