Now that I am in my third trimester, I have been thinking a lot about the actual labor and delivery of this baby. I started writing my birth plan today and realized that I should probably write more than "Please don't hurt me" and "Make sure the baby has all of his body parts before handing him to me." (Kidding... sort of.)
So I'd like to get some opinions and advice from all of you that have given birth at least once in this lifetime.
What are some common (or not common) things you included, or wish you had included in your own birth plans? And why?
PS, I have switched to a midwife and will be delivering my baby, with a widwife, in a hospital.
PPS, I have also decided (I think) to delivery naturally, with the option of a walking epidural if I can't handle it.
I am open to anything, so don't be shy!
Yay for natural birth! :)
ReplyDeleteOkay, some thoughts. First, talk to your midwife about getting an IV put in when you first get there. We were told with our third (when I finally decided to go all natural) that I had to have the IV put in, just in case. So they did, and it just meant my hand hurt for a few days for nothing. I found out a few weeks later that I could have insisted on not getting that, and I just would have had to sign a waiver. I will do that next time (preferably when I register, if possible).
Second, figure out a system for letting Jaymeson know when/if you need drugs and when/if to try to talk you through it. With my deliveries, when I got to the point of thinking "I can't handle this" it was only a short time before our baby was born, especially toward the end of pushing (that, of course, won't affect your decision for drugs, since you can't have any at that point, but have Jaymeson remind you of this when you get to that stage). Be ready with some ideas of ways to cope with the pain. Personally, I found that closing my eyes and squeezing the plastic of the bed was the best for me. With my eyes closed, I could focus entirely on breathing, and squeezing allowed me a solid outlet for the pain. Our prenatal class taught us about massage, but when my contractions hit I didn't want Brian touching anything other than my hands and head.
It's also a good idea to talk episiotomy with your midwife. I know most OBs take the approach of not doing one unless you're starting to tear, but I think midwives prefer to let you tear. Find out the pros and cons to each and then decide how you want to proceed.
I know it's not part of the birth plan itself, but bring different things to do at the hospital as you'll find some are better than others at distracting you from the pain.
One last element of the birth plan that Jaymeson will agree with--decide before hand that you won't blame him or swear at him. :)
So excited for you!!!!
Third trimester already? Woah! That's exciting!
ReplyDeleteIf you are wanting to go natural, I suggest reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (it's about SUPER natural birth, as in not even at the hospital, but the birth stories will fill you with womanly power!) and the book "Active Birth." That one talks about the best techniques for alleviating the pain, how to open up the birth canal, yoga moves that will help you, etc. I love love loved that book, even though I ended up with an epidural.
Birth plan-wise, if you don't write one down, I suggest making sure everyone in the room understands what you want, because you won't really be in a position to argue much if a nurse/midwife/doctor suggests an unnecessary procedure. For me, that was my doula and husband.
I would also suggest adding things in your birth plan that make the hospital the most comfortable for you: low lights, music playing, a birthing ball/stool, etc. And be flexible! Don't beat yourself up if things don't go according to plan.
Congratulations!
Yay for the third trimester!
DeleteFirst of all, I want to say good for you for researching your options. Many first time Mom's go in for delivery without even researching different alternatives.
With that being said, I do want to clarify one thing. "Walking Epidurals" in most cases the patient is not able to walk around the room/hallway. The dose the give you is a low-dose epidural and fentanyl for pain. Most hospital due to safety risks will not allow you to walk because it does numb your lower extremities. If it is not numbing your lower extremities you will probably be in too much pain to even try to walk. The walking epidural can be good for FTM's as it is not as strong as a "normal" epidural. It can allow for you to have more sensation "down there" so you will be able to push easier and more effectively. However, the fentanyl does cross the babies blood stream and can leave you and baby feeling tired post delivery where as a normal epidural does not cross the babies blood stream.
Talk with your OBGYN or CNM and ask them what common relief measures anesthesia uses in your hospital. For example, just 15 minutes down the road c-section Mom's recieve PCA's after c-sections and 30 minutes down the road they get Duramorph (much quicker relief and normally a better response then PCAs). So, Anesthesia options can vary hospital to hospital and state to state. Your OBGYN or CNM will most likely agree with your choice but when it comes down to it the Anesthesiologist is going to be the one performing it so it is up to them as far as dosages, strengths, medications etc.
I agree with the PP, have some sort of code with your husband for when you just can't handle it anymore. Make sure he knows what the birth plan is because you will be most likely too tired to fight with the hospital staff to ensure your birth plan is carried out.
What I would recommend after working in a hospital setting for three years now with laboring Mom's is that you make your plan short and sweet. Unfortunately, hospitals are set up as puppy mills and the majority of staff (this sounds horrible) but tend to follow shorter birth plans as they are easier to remember. I would put on the birth plans the things you are NOT willing to budge about. For example, I do NOT want my baby to be transitioned outside of my room. A lot of hospitals now days transition the baby at the bedside but the one I am delivering at does not. So, it will be in my birth plan that unless Alexis is in distress or needs to be transfered to a higher level of care she will NOT leave my room. Transition can and has been completed fully at the bedside there is no reason why you need to take my baby out of the room for 4 hours so she can sit on a warmer by herself. I also want my baby to be able to be skin to skin with me immediately following delivering and allowed to breast feed before completing her newborn assessment and medications.
Also, I don't know about you.... but I have a huge family and was exhausted after 23 hours of labor and couldn't regulate everyone coming in and out and was getting overwhelmed. So, we had the nurse regulate the flow of visitors. When it came down to delivery, it was just Michael and I and it was a special moment as it was the last time it would ever just be us.
Another thing, post partum we had everyone come to the hospital to see her at first (in waves) in then everyone went home and we had them wait until the following day. I see so many mom's needing to feed their babies, or get up to go to the restroom (and are fearful they will be bleeding on the floor) and let their visitors run the show. Visitors are important, but you're baby needs you. Allow them to come when you're comfortable or kindly ask them to step out so you can handle going to the restroom or what not without them right next to you.
DeleteI would also recommend breaking your birth plan up by labor/delivery, recovery, and post-partum.
http://www.google.com/search?q=birth+plans&hl=en&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=7R2RUYi9BpDy9gSUtICoBA&sqi=2&ved=0CAcQ_AUoAQ&biw=1170&bih=687#imgrc=ZXl-qWZAB1Z7xM%3A%3BS5j0rpb85bLNeM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fchildbirthcollective.files.wordpress.com%252F2012%252F02%252Fbp31.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fchildbirthcollective.wordpress.com%252F2012%252F02%252F10%252Fwriting-your-birth-plan%252F%3B600%3B511
Anyway, I hope this helps! Remember... do not let other sway your decisions. Stick with what seems right and feels right to you! :) Best of luck!!
Oh and another one is about artificially rupturing your bag of water if your bag of water is still intact. Once you are ruptured most hospital will not let you go over 24 hours especially if you are running a temperature. As it increases the risk of infection for you and baby. Rupturing your bag of water can allow you to progress but sometimes the bag is ruptured and no changes happen. This is a lot of times why induction especially lead to C-sections.
ReplyDeleteI had my first with an epidural- loved it.
ReplyDeleteI had my second totally natural (on purpose) -also loved it.
There is no right or wrong way to have a baby, if you want to do it natural- do it! It is invigorating and exciting. The labor is always longer with your first though, so i would definitely prepare. I used the Hypnobirthing method and I now suggest reading up on relaxation techniques wether you do it natural or not. I also found the documentary the Buisness of being born to be very interesting (warning: they show actual births) The key in my opinion, is to just relax and let your body do what it was made to do. I also found that with the natural birth/labor the husband is much more involved in the whole process. There is a whole lot of other stuff, IV's Pitocin after the birth, breaking your water,labor positions etc.. Just educate your self, prepare and practice, but don't stress! Birth is amazing anyway you do it!
Well looks as if you have a lot of really great advice so far! I am going to stir the pot a little though with my suggestions...
ReplyDeleteIf you are anything like me I would say throw the written birth plan out the window! I think you and Jaymeson should be able to communicate how you want things to go before hand and then when it's baby time, you will find that situations will arise and you'll be able to make your decisions off of what you feel is right in the moment and what you two had previously discussed. I say this all because with your first I think things are very unpredictable, the unknown (or at least more so then with your 2nd,3rd,4th baby etc). This is all just from my own personal experience! I had a birth plan all written out and because of my personality when things went the exact opposite of what I had 'planned' out (wanting to go natural but not being able to take it, laboring for 13+ hours, a c-section in the end etc.) I was pretty emotionally upset about it. I think it was part my hormones at the time and part my expectations but I cried a lot about how things had gone, which was so silly. There was nothing anyone could've done different and the nurses and doctor were all great, it was just me. I had put so much stock and such an expectation on my whole labor and delivery that I was the one that set myself up for disappointment. The only thing that matters is that a healthy baby boy is born whether by doing it natural, with a walking/reg epidural, c-section etc. I think going in to this with no expectations is the better way to go, especially with your first! Now Im not saying to not research and read up different birth plans, also there are things that you will want to discuss with your midwife, (episiotomy) and some of the nurses before hand. But I think for the most part you should just enjoy the experience and let things happen as they will and be proud of yourself no matter how you deliver your sweet baby boy! :) You will do great, and everything will happen as it should, so don't stress!!!
I hope this all makes sense... lol!